


First Mistake

by SevereLove51



Series: First [4]
Category: X-Men Evolution
Genre: M/M, Male Slash, Older Man/Younger Man, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2018-12-25
Packaged: 2019-09-27 10:58:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17160764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SevereLove51/pseuds/SevereLove51
Summary: Logan's reflection on his relationship with Scott





	First Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> This is the last of the "First" series. I may write another one, but on how the X-Men reacts to Logan's and Scott's relationship. If you guys want me to write one, feel free to leave a comment about it.

Logan is a man who has lived longer than he’s supposed to. He survived two world wars, been in too many fights to count and been victim to an inhumane human experiment. Logan has made many mistakes in his life, most he doesn’t remember, but recently his relationship with Scott fills him with guilt.

It’s wrong to say that Logan’s relationship with Scott is a mistake, nothing about their relationship is toxic or abusive. Save for his sarcastic, cold demeanor, he would never verbally abuse Scott, Logan knows Scott’s been through too much. Logan always kept a mental note to never overstep his boundary. He needed to keep the inner Wolverine suppressed to avoid hurting the people he cared about. Logan scoffed at that. Five years ago, he was alone, something that he still enjoys, but when Xavier offered him refuge at his mansion with a crazy idea to be a safe haven for mutants, Logan joined. 

In the beginning, Logan barely stayed around. He did help Xavier with chores around the mansion, especially with fixing things, but there was no other mutant other than the three of them until Scott came along. A broken abused 15-year-old boy, who constantly flinched whenever someone looked at him. 

Logan remembered the smell of blood and other men that constantly followed Scott during his first two weeks. No matter how hard Scott tried to scrub his skin in hopes to satisfy his internal disgust, the soap only mildly suppresses the smell. It took weeks for Scott to speak without stuttering every word and months for him to make eye contact with anyone. Logan had made certain to keep his distance. Logan assumed that the men who hurt Scott looked or build similar to him. Though times when they crossed the path, Scott’s fear scent spiked up and Logan dreamt of slicing every single person who hurt Scott. Fortunately, with Xavier’s help, Scott grew out his shell and turned into the powerful leader he is now. Still, Logan kept his boundary and their relationship was one of mutual respect until recently.

Logan glanced over to Scott’s sleeping body. Scott was turned facing Logan with his sleeping mask covering his eyes. This has been going on for three months and Scott was two months away from graduating. Scott wanted to reveal their relationship to everyone after he graduates. To Logan, it’s been a miracle that no one founded out yet. Both Jean and Xavier could read minds, but neither has mentioned it to either of them. Hank has a heightened sense, though weaker than Logan’s, could notice that Scott’s scent has a bit too much of Logan in it. Still, no one has approached them. Logan figured that they were too intimidated by Logan that they didn’t want to humiliate them. 

Though, Xavier’s reaction to their relationship has been in the back of his mind. Logan imagined Xavier’s disappointment. Logan laid on his side, facing the wall. He knew Xavier would disapprove, especially since Scott is still in high school.   
Somedays he wondered if this was a mistake. He wondered how he got himself into this mess, his first mistake that led to this domino effect. 

Maybe his first mistake was when he first developed feelings for Scott. In the beginning, Scott had been a scrawny kid who was malnourished and pale. After a couple of months at the mansion, Scott became more built and grew taller yet still maintaining his lean body. He wasn’t attracted to Scott then. Scott was still underage and smelled like a stereotypical teenager, sweat and body order mixed with cologne to mask the smell. His scent matched well with the other mutant teens that resided at the mansion. When Scott turned 18, Scott’s scent changed. He carried a strong scent, an intoxicating scent that nearly drives him crazy every time Logan was near him. Scott smelt like multiple things, the gas of his car, his new cologne that carried a woodsy, spicy scent, and soap. Lots of soap. Scott had his own smell, different from the other teens, different from Ororo, Charles, and Hank. Scott became a unique scent that Logan could immediately identify from the other side of the mansion. Even after the long, exhausting, sweaty training in the Danger Room, Scott still had that unique smell and that annoyed Logan. That stupid scent followed Logan, always crawling into his mind whenever he was alone. Logan had ignored the growing desire that gripped his stomach and for a long time, he was good at suppressing it.  

Maybe his first mistake was kissing Scott back. Logan could smell the nervousness off Scott. At the time, Logan didn’t know why Scott was nervous. For the longest time, Logan had picked up Scott’s fluctuating hormones. For the longest time, Logan believed it was towards Jean since the two had been getting closer recently. Logan believed that the reason why Scott was nervous because it had something to do with Jean. So when Scott kissed him, he was confused. Logan remembered Scott fumbling with an excuse to why he kissed him. To shut him up, Logan kissed him back. It was quick, he wanted it to be something more, but his self-will pulled him from going too far. He needed to control himself. Logan didn’t apologize when he left. After the kiss, Logan took a long cold shower to suppress the warm feeling inside him.   
  
Maybe his first mistake was not handling it well. The week after the kiss, Logan avoided Scott. He needed too. Scott was 18 and still probably clouded with teenage judgment. Logan believed Scott was mistaking love with infatuation because that’s what’s most teenagers do. He ignored the longing, desperate stares from Scott. Every time he passed Scott, he could feel the hurt he caused the kid.  
Logan thought he could handle the rest of the week without succumbing to Scott’s sadness until Scott was at his door. 

“Logan?”

“What do ya want, kid?”

“Someone told Bobby that it was senior prank day today, so he decided to ice my room. I wanted to know if I could sleep in your room.”

Logan was reluctant at first. He feared what would happen if he let Scott in. Logan looked at the kid’s face. He could tell, despite his glasses, Scott was staring at him with hopeful eyes. Logan sighed and opened the door to let Scott in.

Logan let Scott sleep on his bed while he slept on the floor. That night he couldn’t sleep. Scott’s scent was too strong for Logan to suppress. It infiltrated his nostrils and into his mind where his own thoughts of Scott sprouted. He thought back to the kiss, how soft Scott’s lips were and how much force was in it. Logan imagined it going further, his hand gripping Scott’s head to continue kissing him, his other hand sliding down Scott’s back into his pants- 

“The hell is wrong with you, Summers?” Logan remembered the words ripping through his throat into a snarl. He hated the scents, the fucking fantasies of this kid constantly on his mind wherever he goes.   
  
Maybe that’s his mistake. He fell in love with Scott. He allowed himself to fall in love with Scott. Logan knew he could have avoided it. He should have left when he started developing feelings, but a voice in his head told him to stay. Logan had found a home in the X-Men and he knew deep down he didn’t want to leave. So he stayed, believing he could handle his feelings. That night, they talked it out. Logan confessed to Scott that he’s been pining after him for months. Scott confessed to same and they both mutually agreed to date, but in secret. Neither Logan or Scott wanted to deal with the attention of everyone in the mansion, especially from Charles. They both also mutually agreed, though Scott was a bit reluctant, that if Charles found out, they had to break up. Logan hoped that Charles never finds out. If they did break up, it would be by their own terms and not because of Charles. That night Logan felt a lot less angry than he ever did.  
  
Logan has made many mistakes in his life. He knew falling in love with Scott is, but he doesn’t regret it. He regrets pushing others away. He never gave love a chance. He allowed himself to succumb to the fear of losing someone. He knew he lives a life of violence. People will always get hurt, but he realized he had an opportunity for a relationship, to be able to overcome his fear. Logan knew he will always worry. Whenever Scott came to bed, Logan holds him a bit tighter when the kid falls asleep. However, living in a mansion filled with vulnerable teenagers  
that’s what Logan is supposed to do, protect people. He knows that as a mentor, a friend and as a boyfriend that’s he’s has to do and is going to do.  
  
This time Logan shifts in bed. He turns facing Scott and rests his arm over the kid’s waist. Before he rests his head, he kisses Scott on the cheek. Logan takes in the surrounding scents. He takes in Scott’s natural scent, the strawberry-scented shampoo, and the overpowering body lotion. Logan is able to rest now. He knows that this isn’t a mistake and this is where he has to be. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Don't worry, they're still together ;)


End file.
